Shattered
by LoverOfTragedies
Summary: The picture is shattered. Now we must go on. Carrying the shards of glass, we carry with us the Dane that left the world. Trying to fix the pieces, we must let go and start anew. (Sequel to Farther and Farther. In order to understand this, please read it first. :) )
1. Pieces

Shattered

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><p><em><strong>Your face. Your smiling face. It both mocks and saddens me.<strong>_

_**Why did you have to go?**_

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><p><strong>The pages, scorned with red. The libretto has not ended.<strong>

**The climax has yet to begin.**

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><p>Its days after the incident. That tragic event that almost tore our family apart. Berwald and Tino moved after the event, much to Tino's pleading to Berwald. Emil secluded himself more, even refusing to answer Leon's texts or my calls.<p>

And I sit here, alone and wondering. Wondering still on the event. Contemplating the imponderable. How did this happen anyway? How long did he suffer?

Not noticing that I was already crying, I stare out of the window. I opened it after we found out about it. Opening a random page, I started reading. His thoughts about everything, written on the page.

Moments later, I was shocked. How much was he keeping secret? It's quite absurd because the Dane was impulsive, very impulsive. This much sadness from the very chipper Dane was to be feared.

Sensing some form of curiosity from my mourning, I opened the diary to another random page, and read it. As the same as the other page I read, it contained his thoughts, except these writings on the page where more of a letter to someone. Asking the person some form of mercy, but I can't read it all, the page, littered with tears and blood, have made the ink run all across the page. I guess this was a part of his little suicidal tendency.

Deciding to stop reading the diary for a while, I went to check Emil's room. Since the incident, I became more overprotective of Emil. Fearing that he might follow the Dane, I tended to watch almost every action of his.

Going to his room, I knocked at the door. Hearing a small grunt from the other side, I shrugged it off, knowing that Emil doesn't want anyone bothering him.

This goes on every day. My tendency to read a page of the Dane's diary and my constant checking on Emil is quite annoying, but I must go on.

**Or else I too may have my libretto end.**

This libretto of mine won't. I will not let it end. I will move on, carrying with me a burden of the family, along with the mourning for the Dane.

**But all this sadness in the air is lethargic.**

**I need to breathe.**

Deciding that staying in the Dane's house is actually bad for our psychological health, I immediately depart the house along with Emil. He's still mourning for the Dane, given the fact that he's the only Nordic that Mathias was actually nice to. I'm worrying about him. He might follow the Dane.

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><p>Tino's still sad about Mathias' death. Even I am quite sad, and both of us are still mourning. Since the day that Tino decided to depart, we took refuge in one of the homes in Helsinki. He's still crying about it every night, and I just can't literally comfort him.<p>

Inwardly, I'm actually getting shattered. The thought that I was a part of the reason of Mathias' suicide is actually repulsive. Repulsive because he's my brother. And because of my distinct anger to him, in reality it was just some form of revenge, he became reclusive and depressed. Even after reading his diary, I still can't withstand the fact that it happened to him.

Trying to salvage the remains of this family, I will start with Tino. But even I need some form of help. I just can't do this alone. I can't rely on Lukas this time, since he has a bigger problem, and it's Emil.

Going to Tino, I reluctantly embrace him. It's because I find him crying again on the sofa. Comforting him, saying everything's alright, I embrace him more and try to make him calm down. I told him that we need to depart again, even if we are staying in Finland. Tino's quite hesitant to leave, since he still hasn't moved on about the incident, but after some persuasion, I got him to pack his stuff.

Looking out of the window, I see the calm streets of the neighborhood, along with the snow falling from the sky. Seeing the little kids play, a small idea to fear forms in me. What if Sealand finds out about this? It would surely crush his little mind. Mathias was one of his playmates, even if the Dane was quite of a childish person. Panicking slightly, I turn to Tino, telling him about what I thought.

Even he is afraid. We both know that Sealand would arrive a few days later. He's still staying with Arthur for the time being. We need to find out, and quick. Hastening our departure, we immediately packed for Oslo. We need Lukas' help on this one. Only he might know what to do with the conundrum that would be sent out our way.

**I will burn this libretto. I will not allow this.**

**The script will change, by my hands.**

**This tragedy will be erased, little by little.**

After arriving in Oslo, we immediately rush to Lukas' house, only to find both Lukas and Emil sitting on the chairs of their veranda. Lukas immediately gives a nod and opens the door for us. Tino rushes to the guest rooms, afraid and wanting some time alone.

Talking to Lukas, I tell him our situation. He's deeply thinking. I'm actually afraid now. Even Lukas is quite perplexed by our situation. But I just really can't place all this burden to him. I also thought for my solution.

Overhearing us, Emil quickly butts in, saying that the others are getting suspicious of our actions. I shrug it off, but Lukas is still deeply thinking. Explaining to the others about the situation would be easy, but explaining to a child who is stubborn but caring might be difficult.

Now, Lukas immediately tells me his plan, and I keep it to myself. But Lukas gave another threat. What would happen to the land of Denmark? Would there be another personification? Or would it sink?

Nowadays, the nations doesn't really have a clue on what would happen. The latest death, before Denmark, was the land of Prussia, but even he is still alive now. We have not encountered and recorded a death of a personification and its effects properly.

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><p><strong>The mirror's shattered. The true images appear.<strong>

**Phantasmagoria on the left, reality on the right.**

**We must choose.**

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><p><em><strong>That not everyone is keen about life.<strong>_

_**But talk about death, everyone chatters as if they know what it is.**_

_**But talk about rebirth, chaos ensues.**_

_**Will there be a second chance?**_

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><p><strong>A.N.: Hello again! Welcome to the second part of the Tragic Libretto series<strong>

**Yes, a series! :) I decided to continue Farther and Farther, but now with another story.**

**I'm not sure if you'll like this, but please do read and review.**

**~LoverOfTragedies**


	2. Fragments

Fragments

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><p><strong>In totality, a mirror is a sum of its fragments.<strong>

**In each fragment holds a reflection.**

**Fear if it refracts.**

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><p><em><strong>Days come by, and we want time to stop.<strong>_

_**All hell might go lose tomorrow.**_

_**We just need some more time.**_

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><p>Tino and I am very much afraid for tomorrow. We still have no idea on how to tell Sealand about Mathias. It's literally eating us out. We need more time. We can't fathom on what would happen tomorrow.<p>

Apparently, Peter was very ecstatic to return home, exclaiming that he would play with Mathias. Our hearts crumpled and were shattered. His voice was so happy, and yet tomorrow, it will break.

Lukas, on the other hand, seems to be reading still the diary, but with a scrutinizing gaze. Even I can't peek in the diary. I still found some revelations a few days ago quite repulsive. Even the snow, I abhor. We need to move on.

Tino's literally afraid of what would happen. More afraid than I am. Consoling my "wife", I told him that everything would be okay, more or less. But instead, he screams at me, saying that it really isn't.

I know I keep on deluding myself that it's alright, even if it literally isn't. Sighing, I proceeded to the mirror, seeing my reflection. Or, rather, a twisted reflection. I saw myself, covered in blood, with the same clothes during the bloodbath. Holding Mathias' head with my left, and his burnt flag with my right.

I immediately punched the mirror, grabbing to my instincts, afraid of the phantasmagorical image. Slumped on the wall, and my hand bleeding, I sigh again. I can't take much more. I need to do something.

Even carpentry doesn't take my mind off of things nowadays. I need Tino. Rushing to him, I embrace him tightly, afraid that I might go insane. His presence is my only incentive right now. Shocked, he hugs back, rubs my back and tells me to sit down and tell everything.

And tell everything I did. He was quite shocked too. Even the pain right now can't console me. We just need to wait for tomorrow.

**The realm of phantasmagoria is quite surreal.**

**It's where he died, too.**

**I need to go back.**

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><p>Hearing the mirror break, I shrugged it off. I placed the diary of Mathias on the table and proceeded to the steps of our veranda. Sighing as well, I felt tired. All these emotional burdens are quite tiring for me. Inwardly, I also fear for what Berwald fears.<p>

That we might lose another one. I know we must prevent it, but it's like we have premonitions we can't.

Looking at the snow, I muttered under my breath something even I find quite inaudible. Standing up, I walk away for a while, trying to forget, even for a little while, the tragic accident.

It's not working. It's like Mathias lurks in every snowflake. His presence still lingers in the snow, as if he has not move on to the other side. It's like his ghost, wherever it is, is mocking me for my shortcomings.

Accepting the fact that I can't take much more of this, I immediately go back in the house. Emil's on the couch, staring at space, as if Mathias is there. Berwald and Tino's upstairs. I hope we all can cope well.

**The little flakes of snow feels so heavy.**

**As if some malice resides in the air.**

**We can't anymore stall.**

**We must accept and move on.**

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><p><span>Time Skip<span>

It's the day. Tino and I rush to the airport in Oslo to fetch Peter. Upon fetching Peter, we met Arthur, sitting on a chair next to a flailing Peter. When Peter saw us, he immediately cannonballed himself to me. He was exclaiming a lot of stuff, including his hatred to Arthur and his wanting to play with Mathias. Again, our hearts break into pieces. Arthur, who what watching us, was now staring, as if we are hiding something.

Sighing, I signal Arthur to follow us. Agreeing with us, we immediately reached the parking lot and drove off to Lukas' house. The ambiance of car is so heavy, and so thick, that nothing can cut through it.

It was a very long trip, for such a short distance. Fearing the most awaited event, we arrived at Lukas' house, only for Peter to immediately rush inside and look for Mathias. While I went to chase Peter, I told Tino to tell some things to Arthur. Reluctantly abiding, Tino elicits his attention and whispers to him. Whispers the word I don't want to hear.

Running after Peter, I hear some shouts of "Bloody Hell!" and "Are you serious?!". Trying to shrug it off, I went on to Peter, only to find him going to me, asking where Mathias is. I told him to ask his Uncle Lukas, for he "might" have the "answers" he needs.

Going to Lukas, Peter immediately asks. Sighing, Lukas tell Peter straight-to-the-point about Mathias' whereabouts. At first glance, Peter laughs it off, finding it to be a joke. But when he saw Lukas' face, his own distorts. Screaming "What do you mean he's dead?!", he runs off, crying. I run to him, trying to console him. His denial of the truth is heart-wrenching. I know it's normal for a child to take something as a death of a relative as heart-breaking, but this, this is quite weird. His tears feel heavy against my chest. I can't withstand this. Consoling him again, I told him that it would be alright, lying to myself again.

A little later, Tino and Arthur arrive in the house, to find a crying Peter on my arms. Peter then runs off to Tino, asking if it was some form of cruel joke. Even Tino's face distorts at Peter's denial. Salvaging whatever Peter's strength has, Tino tells him to go upstairs with him for a talk. On the other hand, Arthur approached me and asked some things, including a question regarding on the others finding out. I disregarded that question and told him not to spread the word. It's not fair for the others to know without us moving on. Sure, Arthur was informed in advance, but we can't hide anything from him if he was to confront us.

Accepting the loss, he sighs with discomfort, telling us that we should be careful. Indeed we will be. I will not let this family crumble down to mere fragments. No. I will try to make this family somewhat whole again. And I will start, today, with Peter.

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><p><strong>A child, scarred, reduced to mere tears and wailing.<strong>

**Adults, mourning, reduced to mere pieces.**

**The mirror lines up again. Fragmented.**

**Some show reality, some show phantasmagoria.**

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><p><em><strong>This have not gone to what we wanted.<strong>_

_**But was it really from the start?**_

_**We don't know.**_

_**The only thing we know is that**_

_**Tomorrow, from now on, will never be the same.**_

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><p><strong>A.N.: Hello! And welcome to Fragments, the second chapter to Shattered!<strong>

**Apparently, I somehow conjured this in a rush. I'm not sure if you'll like it.**

**But please read and review!**

**~LoverOfTragedies :)**


	3. Shards

Shards

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><p><strong>Certainly the refraction came<strong>

**The shards, refracted illusions**

**Bloody red, or silvery white, we don't know**

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><p><em><strong>One, Two, Three, Four<strong>_

_**I'm knocking at your doors**_

_**Five, Six, Seven, Eight**_

_**All of you, given a date**_

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><p>It's been a few days after Peter arrived, along with the revelation, and he still hasn't picked it up very well. Tino and I are horridly worried about his condition. He's still hasn't come out of the room yet, and he hasn't spoken since he knew about the incident.<p>

We're sincerely worried about him. We're fearing that he might follow Mathias. He really adores Mathias, and with him receiving the news, his whole personality crumbled to nothing. His face, once vibrant, now pale and twisted.

Sighing, we knock at the door of the room, calling Peter's name. As always, there is no response. Only the sight breathing of a child can be heard from the other side.

We know that it's unfair for Peter, but he must understand that it death happens to everyone. And we'll help him understand. But not today. We still can't force more things that he doesn't understand.

**Worriedly, the shards of innocence, when looked upon**

**Is actually scary, for innocence is really not about goodness**

**We fear that his might distort.**

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><p>Busied with Peter, Berwald and Tino were tired, emotionally tired of all of this. They told me they need to rest for a while, and I knew what it meant.<p>

Nodding at their request, an apology and a grunt has been replied. I just can't understand all of this. Nor can I accept the fast-paced changes happening around me.

Everything's faded to a blur, and it's too hard to see. I need to slow down. Most of the things that will happen relies on our actions, and I will not allow it to take a turn for the worse.

Still, I'm worried about Emil. Even with if he is socially inept, this reclusion of his is quite frightening. It's not normal for him to do this. And so it eats my thoughts. I need to focus.

Laying his diary down the table, it gets covered with snow. Sighing, I again remember Mathias. Until now, I have only comprehended a little of his thoughts through the diary.

Looking outside, the silent streets, filled with snow, gives an atmosphere of relief. The absence of anything eerie or jovial is quite good for us. We can't remember it anymore. It's destroying us.

Going inside, I leave the diary on the table, along with my thoughts about it, and rest.

**In the coffins, a letter can be seen**

**Along with some keys, a blood-stained dress**

**And a crying girl**

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><p>I have to admit, the family's still not taking this very well. I'm not sure how to fix it. Only Mathias knows how. Given his stubborn but jovial attitude helps the family become one. Knowing the fact that he's been depressed for a very long time is quite absurd. But reality loves to pile things up, so here we are, dealing with a loss and dealing it wrong.<p>

We need to move on, badly. Confronting Lukas, I ask him on how we'll change things back to normal. Even he has no answer yet. He tell me that I shouldn't force this. That everything must fall into its proper places, in its proper time.

Understanding when he said, I try to comprehend now on what are the pieces, and when. Contemplating the imponderables, I tell Tino to prepare. We need to leave, and badly. We think that Peter feels the lingering presence of Mathias in the house, and we think it's unhealthy for him to stay here.

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><p>Time Skip<p>

It has been a week after our departure, and I decided to contact Lukas. Calling through the phone, all I hear is the dial tone. Fearing something happened to them, I somehow panicked a little, until someone answered the phone. Instead of hearing Lukas' voice, Emil instead is on the other line.

Asking him some questions regarding them, he answered somehow sadly, as if something happened. Another question slips my lips, regarding Lukas, and he becomes somehow silent. Fearing the worst, I press things further, only to hear a beep from the other side. Grunting, I told Tino that I need to leave, because something might have happened to Lukas in Oslo.

Leaving immediately, I fled. From Stockholm to Oslo, I was rushing to get to Lukas. My thoughts swirled around him. On what could have happened to him.

Upon arrival, I was greeted by a worried Emil. Rushing inside, I find no one in the rooms of the first floors. Going upstairs, my feet feel so heavy. As if something is dragging me down.

Going to his room, it feels like there is this ambiance of dread and depression. Knocking on his door, there is no response. Fearing the worst, I knock the door down. Upon seeing the room, I find a half-dead Lukas. Asking Emil on what happened, he responds an "I don't know." to me, finding the fact that Emil's face distorts to fear.

Contacting Tino, I rush Lukas to my car, driving quickly to the hospital. Hearing Tino's gasps of fear, he immediately calls Peter to go with him, telling that there was an emergency in Lukas' house.

Sighing, I wondered on what happened to Lukas, upon arriving in the hospital, I immediately rush to the nurse's desk to ask for help, since Lukas' health might decline further. Understanding the situation, the nurse asks for a doctor to monitor Lukas, while he was being brought to a hospital room.

Fearing the worst, I just waited for Tino to arrive, along with Peter, and receive the news about Lukas. Until that, I wait. Wait for some impending doom following our footsteps.

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><p><strong>The libretto, splashed with blood<strong>

**Has been rewritten**

**The clock's hands, stabbed on the paper**

**Glint with light**

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><p><em><strong>Devoid of life, filled with despair<strong>_

_**These are the things I can't bear**_

_**My requests nullified**_

_**With bare hands I fight**_

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><p><strong>A.N.: Hello! And welcome to the third chapter of Shattered, Shards!<br>Apparently, I just wrote this like how I wrote Fragments, in a rush.  
>So if you find anything wrong, please to tell me.<br>Don't forget to read and review!**

**~LoverOfTragedies**


	4. Slivers

Slivers

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><p><strong>The hands of the clock, once more, move<strong>

**The blood red moon glistens in the night**

**Making merry, ignoring the doom**

**Then later, they die**

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><p><em><strong>A masquerade of feelings<strong>_

_**The masks of fear**_

_**And the faces of regret**_

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><p>The beeps of machines, the drops of medicine, and the abnormal shade of white. It's what littered the room Lukas was in. It is really shocking to find him like this. Weak and half-dead. As if wanted to die.<p>

No! I will not allow! This will not be! There will be no more casualty, for no one's hands! Tino looks at me with significant fear. Peter stands unmoving, quite shocked from the news. Losing an uncle, he already can't handle. What about two?

Waiting for Lukas to wake up, a doctor goes in the room, checking his status. The doctor, saying bluntly, that he would wake up later on, if not today, at the most tomorrow morning. Somehow relieved of the news, we waited.

While waiting, Tino approached me, asking me about Lukas. I told him all I knew, for I cannot lie to him. Lukas is also important to our family. We can't allow him to die.

A few hours later, Lukas begins to stir on his bed. Startled, Tino rushes to his side, panicking and mother-henning him. As I look at the situation, it seems as if, somehow, I'm quite relieved. Maybe it's because Lukas woke up from his little slumber.

The only thing to do is to ask him personally about what happened. I'm not sure how to pry the information out of him, but I need to. In order to fix this family.

The moment I deemed it favorable for me, I politely asked Tino to leave, telling him to wait for a while because I need to have a little chat with Lukas. He reluctantly obliges and tells Peter to go with him outside, to wait.

Now that we were alone, I asked him what happened and all that he could do is look away. As if he wanted to die. Noticing his actions, I wanted to scream. To scream at him for being a fool. We already lost someone, and we can't lose another. We're already too dysfunctional to begin with, and now that the seams unwove, I can't allow the seams to tear.

Asking him once again, with a tone so poisonous, enough to kill a country with a few drops. He just mutters something that sounds like a wanting. I can't seem to comprehend his actions. Until I heard the last word of his muttering. In disbelief and bewilderment, I asked him why. It seems that Lukas loved Mathias all along.

Understanding his sorrows, I said sorry to him, for not understanding, and slightly hug him. It seemed like he needed it, so I gave him the satisfaction. Deeming the ambiance of being too sad, I asked him of Tino and Peter can come in now, and he nodded.

Opening the door, I signaled Tino and Peter to come in. In an instant, Peter rushes to Lukas' side, asking him so many things. Instead of making Peter suffer more, Lukas lied by saying that he had a small accident at home that somehow became worse.

Believing Lukas, Peter somehow was relieved too. Somehow, I managed to sigh with relief. At least Lukas is safe, and I can still make this family whole.

**After the Never-Ending night**

**Comes the glistening of stars**

**Devoid of either the sun or the moon**

**We're stuck in the middle of two**

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><p>Time Skip<p>

It's been a year since Lukas attempted suicide, and everything went smoothly after that. Deciding that too much distance is quite destructive for us, we decided to live in Stockholm. Lukas has somehow gotten back to his old self, forcing Emil to call him "Big Brother", while Emil has somehow gotten out of his shell and plays with Peter every now and then.

Meanwhile, Tino has become more cheerful from now. Trying his best too, he tries to keep the family together by having picnics and trips everywhere.

As for the other nations, they did find out about Mathias, as much as I don't want them to know. Consoling us, they helped us get back on our feet. I'm quite thankful for their help. At least they can understand the feeling of losing someone dear.

Somehow, it's all back to normal. Sure when Mathias' death anniversary came, we were all sad. But we all understood that we can't keep dwelling in the past. Promising ourselves that we won't forget our dearest brother, we decided that every now and then we visit his house and stay there for a while. Since that's the only place we feel that his presence still lingers, we openly accepted that we need to somehow relive him.

Also, about the diary, it's safely hidden in our house. It's our only memento of Mathias, and we can't afford to lose it. Safeguarding it in a glass cabinet, it reminded us of how we should be united, amidst our problems.

Right now, as I am narrating to you, Peter's happily playing with some kids in the neighborhood, Tino's happily cooking some lunch, Lukas is enjoying his time with Emil, and Emil's somehow happy with his brother.

And I'm happy enough that the family is somehow okay, and hoping for more good things to come our way, and for Mathias to watch us wherever he may be.

**Successfully rewriting the libretto**

**The True End appears**

**Resurfacing to reality**

**With hopes and blessings to unfold**

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><p><strong>A.N.: Hello, and welcome to the epilogue of Shattered! I know it's quite early to end this, but it felt like I should end it. Now I'm gonna wait for ideas to strike my mind for the final part of the series, and I'm hoping that you guys can help me!<strong>

**Please don't forget to read and review!**

**~LoverOfTragedies**


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